Donna Cooper's Chicken Fried Steak Recipe!
from Queen of the Rodeo

“P.S. I’m attaching my recipe for chicken fried steak. It’s the secret Bar G recipe with my own additions, which I’m sure you’ll be able to spot.”

Sure enough, there was the Bar G secret recipe for chicken fried steak, written in Donna's hand and with her many additions.

“Honest-to-God Bar G Ranch Chicken Fried Steak”
(accept no substitutes)

Makes 12 servings in 45 minutes, unless you're drunk, and then it makes 12 servings in an hour and 45 minutes.

3 round steaks
salt
2 cups flour
3 large eggs
6 tablespoons milk
cooking oil
Lone Star beer (6 ice cold longnecks)

Take a round steak and pound that sucker with something hard till it's good and tender. Do the same with the other two round steaks. At this point you'll be thirsty, so open a cold one (Lone Star is best). Trim away the fat and throw it and the bones to the dog (you need all the friends you can get in this world). Cut the steaks into four serving sizes each. Sprinkle with salt.

Put some flour (2 cups) in a pie plate. Whip up 3 large eggs and 6 tablespoons of milk in another pie plate. This is tiring, so you'll need to take another Lone Star break. Then put a sheet of waxed paper, or whatever you have, beside the stove. Drag that meat through the flour, then through the egg mixture, and then through the flour again, and then put it on the wax paper. At this point, look at the mess on your hands and scream! You will want to open another Lone Star, believe me.

Heat a small pond of cooking oil in a 10-inch black cast iron skillet. Make it so hot that it almost burns down the ranch house, but not quite. Flick some water in the skillet and duck. If the oil does catch fire, you have some extra Lone Stars handy for firefighting. Or better yet, just throw the lid on it, yell for help, and save the Lone Star for the firemen.

Slide that meat into the hot oil, and cook it just like you were frying chicken. If you don't know how to fry chicken, you shouldn't be trying this advanced recipe anyway. When it's ready, golden brown, put the meat on paper towels to drain it. While it's draining, have yourself another Lone Star. You've earned it! Oh yes, be sure to smother it all in milk gravy when you serve it. This recipe is guaranteed to make the cowboys happy and you drunk!”